At 4:25 p.m. on Thursday, shockwaves reverberated across the nation: Shohei Ohtani — the Los Angeles Dodgers superstar and Japan’s most eligible bachelor — announced via an Instagram post that he was now married.

I immediately went to alert my Snapchat friend group, only to see that I had been beaten to the punch by another friend who had posted a selfie of herself at work with the caption along the lines of “Ohtani is married — that’s it for me.”

This was a common reaction from both those who avidly follow baseball and those who are fans of Ohtani’s cute, puppy-like face, his 193-cm athletic physique, his charmingly awkward personality ... and did I mention he is an international superstar? Much like a pop idol, Ohtani’s departure from the dating market obliterated the fantasies of millions around the globe.

One of the top comments under Ohtani’s announcement post, which had more than 10,000 likes, is the simple phrase “my life is over.” Another read: “To everyone who just had their hearts broken, let's get stronger! I too will try my best to continue breathing.”

The announcement not only broke hearts but also broke the internet, with terms related to Ohtani’s marriage — such as “Ohtani-san,” “marriage announcement,” “Japanese woman” and “Dekopin (the name of Ohtani’s dog)” — dominating X’s trending terms soon after the news broke.

The term “shitsuren kyuuka” (heartbreak leave) also trended, creating a buzz around a system that allows employees to take time off to recover. Many people on X debated whether it could be used in the wake of Ohtani's marriage.

Speculation surrounding the romantic life of the two-time MVP winner has been constant for years. At one point, for example, Ohtani-watchers believed the older sister of Samurai Japan teammate Lars Nootbaar would make the perfect match. The internet also attempted to connect him with former Japanese volleyball player Maiko Kano ("Look! They're wearing the same bracelet"), although that theory has since been debunked.

Despite being under a giant microscope, Ohtani has been especially talented at keeping things under wraps, with not a single sighting of him with a significant other.

Following the announcement, many expressed shock that a man so devoted to his baseball career would find time to seek a romantic partner.

I texted my baseball fanatic father about the news. “Who is the partner? Is it you?” he asked. Of course, I replied, “(Ohtani said) an ordinary Japanese woman, so it actually might be me.”

I am not the only one finding solace in delusion. Another comment under Ohtani’s post reads, “it’s me guys i’m actually now japanese.” Elsewhere on Instagram, popular Japanese comedian Yuriyan Retriever posted a parodying a live confession in which she implies she is the chosen one. It soon joined the top trending posts.

It seems that literally everyone and their moms were in mourning over the loss of a possible fairy-tale marriage with Japan’s prince charming. Female colleagues in their late 20s and early 30s said that their natural response was to share the pain with their moms.

“(My mother) said it could have been you living in his mansion in L.A.,” my coworker told me. Another mutual Ohtani admirer sent me a screenshot of her chat with her mother: “Surprised and sad to hear the news. I wanted you to marry him” — followed by a crying face emoji.

Things could be worse, though. Many, including myself, released a sigh of relief when Ohtani clarified on Friday morning that he had married an “ordinary Japanese woman” thus defying the Japanese stereotype that baseball players naturally fall for TV reporters.

It would appear that Ohtani — a humble and driven “good boy” — has not tied the knot with a celebrity, and this was a cause for celebration for many.

Speculation is rife over who the lucky girl might be. Some think that it may be revealed at the red carpet event held before the annual MLB All-Star Game where family members usually accompany players.

I, for one, am still holding on to hope. Could it be me?