What's in a name? Well, when it comes to Japanese bands, a lot, actually. Japanese rock groups, like Western psychedelic bands of 30-some years ago, have been coming up with some extraordinarily creative and just plain nutzo band names of late.

The band Seagull Screaming Kiss Her Kiss Her took its name from a song by XTC.

And just as bands such as Quicksilver Messenger Service, the Incredible String Band and Lothar & the Hand People (where are they now?) created some incredibly wonderful and inspired music, the tendency for Japanese musicians to come up with wacko band names seems to go hand-in-hand with making cool, adventurous music. They both draw from same wellspring of inspiration.

Now I hear you saying that there's nothing new here -- rock groups have always had weird names. That's true as far as it goes, but to my way of thinking there's something uniquely surreal about band names like Bump of Chicken, Love Psychedelico (both of whom are riding high on the charts these days), Thee Michelle Gun Elephant, Buffalo Daughter, Luminous Orange, Young Brian's Group, the Cokehead Hipsters, the Menaced Nightingales and Seagull Screaming Kiss Her Kiss Her, to name just a few.

Of course there are bands with bizarre Japanese-language names as well. I'm thinking of underground bands such as Gerogerigegege, which roughly translates as "barf, diarrhea, hahaha." Funny that they never really made it big.

But most Japanese bands use English when naming their groups, and it's not just weird underground bands that have surreal names. Buffalo Daughter's turntable-meister Moog Yamamoto (you gotta like that name!) once told me that the band chose its name because it sounded quintessentially American to them -- and hey, who am I to argue with that? It makes '60s band Buffalo Springfield sound rather prosaic in comparison.

Aiha Higurashi, leader of Seagull Screaming Kiss Her Kiss Her, admits the name is an issue. "A lot of designers hate the name," she recently told me, explaining it's the name of a song by British band XTC. "It's really hard to put the name on a CD. And I don't really like it either -- to say it takes too long."

As for the quirkily named Thee Michelle Gun Elephant, that band's name is apparently a surreal take on the title of an album by the Damned -- "Machine Gun Etiquette." Go figure. That band brings to mind another group with a great name: the Elephant Kashimashi (kashimashi means noisy or boisterous). How about a supergroup called Thee Michelle Gun Elephant Kashimashi?

Sometimes this rather cavalier take on the English language can lead to unfortunately named musical agglomerations such as the Piss Kids and Bullshit. These two bands, by the way, are signed to major labels Sony and Toshiba-EMI, respectively, who presumably are in no hurry to promote their fine music overseas.

And then there are band names that simply suck. Mr. Children is a case in point. Can anybody out there suggest a better name for these guys? Entries on a postcard, please.

As for the KinKi Kids, let me remind my more prurient-minded readers that Kinki refers to the part of western Japan in which Osaka and Kyoto are located. Get your minds out of the gutter, you naughty people!

Speaking of provocative band names, another major label, Warner Music Japan, has an act that goes by the name Cannabis. Does that mean the taima-s they are a-changin'? Sorry.

Like their Western counterparts, however, Japanese musicians usually choose their band names simply because they like the feeling the words impart. For example, Kumi of Love Psychedelico told me in an interview a while back that the name of the band (originally called the Psychedelic Orchestra) has no special meaning.

While there's a certain surreal logic to Japanese band names, some seem to be the product of a local version of MP3.com's Band Name Generator (www.mp3.com/artist/bng/), which comes up with random combinations of words for musicians seeking something with more zing than The Bob Schmeltz Experience. Some of my other fave Japanese band names are MacDonald Duck Eclair, The Slut Banks, Hermann H. and the Pacemakers (the "Hermann H." apparently refers to Hermann Hesse, not Herman and the Hermits), Aggressive Dogs, Super Butter Dog and, of course, 54 Nude Honeys.

The point is that Japanese musicians already have the equivalent of the band name generator programmed into their brains because of the cross-cultural mish-mash they've grown up in. And that's also what makes contemporary J-pop -- at least the more radical, cutting-edge stuff -- so damned interesting.