Mark Heppelle is a 37-year-old Canadian currently living in Japan with his wife and two kids where he runs a small English school. But that's not his only source of income. Heppelle also has a rather unique sports-related job, the results of which can be seen almost daily on sports pages across the globe. He explains:
Q: So, tell us about your part-time job.
A: I'm a urine collector. Actually, as a representative of International Doping Tests and Management (IDTM) -- a Sweden-based company -- I secure urine samples from world-ranked athletes on behalf of various international sport governing bodies.
I conduct both out-of-competition and in-competition testing, though the focus recently has been on out-of-competition tests. These are unannounced and are part of the International Olympic Committee's anti-doping program. All samples that are collected are sent to IOC-approved laboratories for analysis.
How did you get involved in this kind of work?
Through a friend of a friend. The former IDTM representative in Japan was planning to return to her home country and my friend asked if I would be interested in doing this kind of work. I've always been involved with sport, as a player, fan and coach. I also like to travel and my schedule is flexible because I'm self-employed. All these factors made the job a good fit for me.
So let me get this right: you actually have to witness the urine exiting the organ? Who do you think is more embarrassed by this, yourself or the athlete?
Usually me. Most of the athletes we test are ranked in the top 20 in the world rankings of their sport. They've been through the urine sample collection process at competitions and during training many times so the process is familiar to them. With athletes going through it for the first time, there is definitely some nervousness and uneasiness on both sides.
What happens when a woman needs to be tested? I know a few Web sites out there that might pay dearly for the kind of info you could provide.
When I'm conducting an out-of-competition test, I always work with an assistant. If the athlete we are testing is female, I bring a female assistant with me. As you mentioned earlier, the assistant or I must watch and have an unobstructed view of the sample being passed. The person doing the viewing must be of the same sex as the athlete giving the sample, and the view must be clear and unobstructed.
Since it's not always easy to go on cue, have you ever had an athlete experience "stage fright?"
Sure. Imagine someone walking into your office unannounced and asking you to provide a urine sample, and then having the person who is asking for the sample follow you everywhere until you provide one. That's what happens. Once the athlete is notified that they are required to provide a urine sample, they must be kept in sight at all times, right up until the sample is provided. The person who does this is called a chaperone. The longest time I've heard of between notification and completion was when a chaperone had to go back to the Olympic Village with an athlete and wait until the athlete was ready to provide -- and after eight hours and a good night's sleep, he was.
As for me, the longest time I've waited is about 21/2 hours. When a sample is being attempted, I'll run the water in the sink or shower, flush the toilet, talk about a rainstorm at Niagara Falls, anything to help expedite the process.
A friend of mine is a professional tennis player. She once told me that she was approached at a tournament for a sample and it took her five hours and two liters of water before she was able to comply, causing her to forfeit a doubles match. Any incidents like this happen to you?
I had a situation where an athlete came to the doping control waiting room after competing, drank about half a dozen half-liter bottles of water, tried and tried to pass a sample, but nothing. The athlete had to compete in the next round, so a chaperone went with the athlete and stood on the sidelines while the athlete competed and then they both sprinted to the toilet where one of the biggest samples on record was provided.
There is always a way for the athlete to complete their training or competition and doping control to be satisfied while following all the rules of the competition and doping control.
Pardon the pun, but has anyone ever gotten really pissed off when you've asked them to fill the cup?
One of the things that constantly surprises me is the reaction you get from the athletes. For the most part, they're friendly and very cooperative. I think it's because they see it as part of the training and competing process. I have never had an athlete refuse to give a sample. Of course, refusing to provide a sample is looked at the same way a positive test would be by some sport associations and could open up the athlete to sanctions.
On the other hand, the coaches can be a little difficult at times. There was an occasion when a coach shouted and swore at the person informing his athlete that they were required to give a sample. In athletics, athletes have seen doping officers coming and ran away, claiming that they didn't see them and they were training. You rarely get the same reaction twice. But I realize that after an athlete finishes his game, event or training session, the last person they or their coach want to see is someone from doping control, especially if their result was disappointing. Rules are never compromised, but you can show some empathy and understanding for the athlete.
How about positive tests? Do you know of any athlete you've tested who turned up positive?
It's amazing that almost every day in the newspaper there is a story about doping. The percentage of positive tests when compared to the total tests given has actually been decreasing but there are just more tests in more sports being administered. As for samples that I've collected that may have been positive, I can't make any comment. The athletes and their associations are the first ones notified if there is a "non-negative" result and the procedures that follow vary depending on the sport governing body involved.
What's your official job title? Do you ever try to impress women in the bar by telling them about your job?
My title is International Doping Control Officer. Honestly, I've never felt that women would be impressed by the fact that I'm in the urine procurement business. But maybe I was just going to the wrong bars. I'm married now, so attempting to impress people in bars is something that I hope stays in my past.
Do you ever catch yourself inadvertently sneaking a peek at the guy in the next urinal when you're off duty, kind of like an occupational hazard?
You're kidding, right?
Of course. Just taking the piss, as they say in England. Last question: Have you ever seen anything that really sticks out in your mind, so to speak, say a member with distinctive features along the lines of Bill Clinton's supposed birthmark?
No comment.