My seven brothers and sisters testify to the reality that families come in all sizes, shapes and colors. We range in shades from straight coffee to cafe latte to cream.

My daughter's mother is Japanese, and since birth my daughter has had two households. I understand how unusual this is in Japan, but for her it's normal. That her mother and I do not live together is more of a logistical reality than the emotional handicap that some people might think. The important thing is that it works for us.

The reactions we get range from confusion to concern to censure. But the questions are the real gems.