Reader Mail

The fear of appearing henpecked

As for Mike Wyckoff’s Sept. 26 letter, “The men that lack ‘life skills,’ ” from The Japan Times Online, let me tell you about my husband, who used to work for a general trading company. Since our married life began, he has helped me wash dishes after dinner so that we can enjoy the evening hours together watching TV, etc.

Though his company job was hard and busy, he helped me with chores such as cleaning windows — as the high places were beyond my reach — and housecleaning to welcome the new year. Since retiring from the company, he has enjoyed cooking almost every morning, saying he’s an expert on egg dishes.

I grew up in a family where my father and brother worked hard. When I was a child, they chopped wood or cooked when so inclined. I admit that compared with Western men, there aren’t many Japanese husbands who help their wives with chores or who are perhaps as skilled in expressing their love. Still, from generation to generation, many Japanese men cooperate in family matters.

Some Japanese guys tend to pretend to be domineering because of their fear of appearing henpecked. It’s a silly misunderstanding.

hitomi wakutsu
tokyo

The opinions expressed in this letter to the editor are the writer’s own and do not necessarily reflect the policies of The Japan Times.