Fashion designer, 34
On a crowded train, one man noticed that another man had his eyes closed. “What’s the matter? Are you sick?” he asked. “No, I’m okay. It’s just that I hate to see old ladies standing.”
Club manager, 32
A Jamaican guy and Pikachu walk into a casino. A staff member points at Pikachu and asks: “What’s his game? Blackjack?” And the Jamaican says: “No. Poker mon.”
What do you call an exploding monkey? A baboom! Or; Why was the energizer bunny arrested? He was charged with battery. Or; What is E.T. short for? Because he’s got little legs.
What did U.S. President George W. Bush get on his SAT tests? Drool. Or equally appalling is the one about the two peanuts that walk into a bar. One of them was a salted.
Two little potatoes are hitchhiking along the side of a road in America. How do you know which one of them is the prostitute? It’s the one with the sign that says “Idaho.”
We say “oyaji gyagu” when salaryman-types make jokes that aren’t funny. My uncle’s been making the same bad joke for 20 years and it’s not funny, so I say “oyaji gyagu.”