I hate April in Japan. Step outside and the air smells of sweaty underpants. My friend Percy tells me it has something to do with trees secreting spitballs. Which is nice.

Imagine how chuffed I was, then, to discover an even fishier pong down at the headquarters of the Japan Football Association (JFA) last week.

Believe it or not, it had nothing to do with Philippe Troussier's aftershave. But when the Japan coach attempted to convince us that his side had played a blinder in the 1-1 draw with Costa Rica on April 17, the whiff of mucky shorts was unmistakable.