If the Grinch — that well-known wet blanket of holiday mirth — were both a betting man and Japanese, it wouldn't be Christmas he was after. Nor New Year's, nor the Emperor's birthday, nor Golden Week, nor National Toilet Day (Nov. 10. Mark it down).

For such targets are too easy. They sit etched upon the calendar in red holiday ink. Any old grump could ruin those. Just ask my family.

No, if the Grinch were a gambler, he would more likely grind his teeth over that day which brings great joy to all Japanese . . . yet cannot be so accurately predicted. Thus he would have to guess about when to grumble.